Save the date, although not sure when yet

Guess what today is Faithie?  It's Daddy's 38th birthday!!!!  He is the same age as me for six months and then, boo, I go up in age (But don't tell anyone).  Last night he had a dream and saw you in it.  In the beginning of the grieving Daddy would dream about the accident and see you.  Over the last month he wasn't dreaming at all.  Zero dreams, Love, meant he wasn't seeing you at night anymore.

 

 

Nighttime is hard for both of us.  We've always been "night owls" but it's kind of boarding towards "never want to sleep owls".  I do believe on average we fall asleep around 2:00 am.  I have medicine prescribed to help me sleep but I honestly only take it every now and then because I want to stay awake.  I want to keep the next day from coming.

 

Well, my little Lady, God came through last night for Daddy.  He gave him a dream so wonderful and about you that Daddy woke up at 5:20 so joyously happy.  He tried to tell me about the dream at that time but I'm afraid my brain wouldn't cooperate and wake up all the way. 

 

Daddy was on the happy cloud.  He posted this on facebook:

Have you ever woke up from a dream remember ever little detail of the dream? That happened to me this morning. I woke up at 5:20. I will get to the end what means but it's all crazy. I'll keep it short, I may have Heather Marie post the whole version on her blog. I was at my church, in the open area the kids wing. It's where they setup potlucks, birthday parties and so on. It was setup for a birthday party. All the tables had purple table clothes, all the chairs had a purple star tied to them. On the tables was a vase contains a variety of purple flowers. Upstairs was only one person at it was Faith. She could see everything going on. We were having a party for her without her. She was so happy. Faith's birthday is 5/20 and today is my birthday. Pretty cool.

 

Well Daddy described it in great detail when he came home from work to have breakfast with me and Elijah.  (Elijah wanted to make him a Birthday Breakfast so he left work and came to have it with us.)

 

So here it is from everything I remember:

He dreamt it was your birthday and there was a party going on at our church. He told me how it was decorated and the colors were all your favorites.  So this is how I saw his dream as he talked:

 

The picture with the star balloon is from our house right now.  Faithie your very first pastor and his wife bought us four star balloons and attached them to rabbit garden stone. (We are going to put it in our garden this year.)  There was a saying attached to the balloons.  It said:

We started out with five balloons but one slipped away and went up to Heaven, just like Faith.

 

Well all of these balloons are still floating. They have lost some air but it fills us up to see them still floating.  AND in Daddy's dream this is the shape of the balloons.

 

Daddy then described you.  You were wearing the white bridal I made you last year for Halloween.  You had on the Rapunzel hat you bought as a souvenir from Disney.  On your hands were white dress gloves.  (You loved wearing gloves and creating gloves out of paper.)

 

He went onto to say that this was a party to honor you on your birthday.  The kids wing was full of people.  There were so many people in the area that some stood. In the dream everyone bought presents for babies and children.  It was for the Pregnancy Center. The last present that was opened was covered in a blanket that had butterflies on it.  The head of the Pregnancy Center removed the blanket and it was a crib from your Daddy and Momma.  The crib was filled with diapers.

 

 It was a party for you but you up looking down at us from the balcony. Daddy looked up at the balcony and he could see you watching over us during this party.  You were letting Daddy know that you are always here with us in our hearts and that you approved of how we celebrated you.

 

Daddy was so happy, My Love, to see you I believe the most.  My heart is full of love at the joy in his eyes as he told me about this dream. 

 

Faithie Daddy woke up at 5:20.  You were born on 5/20 in 2004.  How amazing is that!  Before Daddy described the dream he told me this, "I know what we are doing for Faithie's birthday this year."

 

So yesterday I was out and about all by myself most of the day.  It's hard being home Baby.  As I was out I was actually listening to music on my own.  I haven't really done that in a few months.  I decided to listen to Matt Redman's 10,000 Reasons.  It was your dad's Aunt Velma's favorite song.  Her family listened to it and held tight to the words.  A few songs later the song, "Never Once" came on and it rang right into my heart

Here is the song on YouTube with lyrics.  I love it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r2CpU39tM0c

 

Here are some of the lyrics:

Standing on this mountaintop

Looking just how far we've come

Knowing that for every step

You were with us

 

Kneeling on this battle ground

Seeing just how much You've done

Knowing every victory

Was Your power in us

 

Scars and struggles on the way

But with joy our hearts can say

Yes, our hearts can say

 

Never once did we ever walk alone

Never once did You leave us on our own

You are faithful, God, You are faithful

 

 Well Faithie this song just resonated deeply with me.  Here on Earth there are battles going on everyday.  There are physical battles like wars, sicknesses', etc.  There are spiritual battles like with Mr. Jason on Sunday.  Daddy and I are willing to stand on the front lines for Christ.  I think it's scary because it opens us up to attacks but as the song says God is Faithful.

 

As I was driving and singing and talking to God I told him since my Princess went to see him, I'm more free about sharing of my love with Jesus and how forgiveness is truly releasing.  As I listened to the song over and over again and praying I asked God what can I do?  I told him I love to talk and would love to just start reaching out to people. 

 

Jamie and I said that we wanted to do some kind of charity thing or something like that when you passed and people generously gave to us.  At that time Daddy wanted to do something heart based. He wanted to start some kind of program to help people receive echo's if they don't have insurance.  We only talked about it a couple of times but in the beginning your mind truthfully travels everywhere.

 

After feeling a desire to do something in your honor and share God's grace, God gave Daddy the beautiful dream.  I think it was God's way of confirming this is the right path.  I know He's not done telling us exactly what to do with all of this but I know that we are having a birthday party for you in May.  I can definitely see you standing on the balcony with Jesus and holding hands and watching with joy and approval.

 

I cannot wait to see the whole dream and God' direction continue to take shape.  Right now it's in a dream but if we keep asking and opening ourselves up to Him I know he'll show us how to take these right steps.

 

 

So I leave you my Lady with lots of love from earth here.

 Mackenzie visited you today.  She made the snow angel for you and left flowers in purple water.  She loves you Baby.  Enjoy the view.

 

Love Always and Forever,

Momma

 

Dear Freinds and Family,

Save the date!!  We are going to have this party for Faithie.  We have five months to get all the details together.  It will probably be on the weekend before Faith's birthday or the weekend after.  Please save the dates and once we settle on one I'll give you the actual date.  For now it's either May 16th (Saturday) or May 23rd (Saturday)

 

Thanks for reading this and joining us on this journey!

 

Love,
Heather